Hooked on a Feeling

Maddie enters the front door, laden down with briefcase, purse, and a pile of file folders. She looks exhausted. She drops her burden on the foyer table. Like a bolt of lightening, Miss Me catapults into the room and excitedly runs in circles around Maddie. Maddie smiles slightly and addresses the puppy.

Maddie: So he was here, huh? And where is he now, may I ask? Gone, like a thief in the night…… Well, I can't think about it now - I am bone tired.

She hands Miss Me a dog biscuit, and goes into the living room. She suddenly feels too tired to climb the stairs. She collapses on the sofa.

Maddie: Just a couple minutes till I get myself together - then I'll go up and get a few hours sleep before I talk to David………where the hell is he? I truly expected him back in the courtroom this morning.

She had been returned to the City Court at 8:45 A.M., and seated in the first row, under the watchful eye of the bailiff. She cranes her neck looking for David, partly dreading the possibility of finding him there, yet disappointed when it appears he has heeded her advice of the previous evening. At precisely 9 A.M., the scene unfolded as it had the day before.

Judge Jackson: So, regarding your experience with rubbing me the wrong way - anything you would like to share with the rest of these people?

Judge Jackson: Thank you, Miss Hayes. Apology accepted. Now where is that partner of yours? Can I expect him to jump up on a table and recite The Declaration of Independence?

Judge Jackson: Very well, Miss Hayes, I am prepared to pass sentence. I find you guilty of speeding and failure to obey a traffic signal, which constitutes reckless endangerment. You will be required to pay a $150. fine, and to serve five days of community service. These days will commence tomorrow. You will report here, to the Parker Center, room 614, at 8 A.M. to be assigned to your work crew. Any questions?

Judge Jackson: You are dismissed, Miss Hayes. A word of warning……your inflexibility and stubbornness are apt to get you into quite a bit of trouble. But I'm sure you've heard that before.

Judge Jackson: Thank you, Miss Hayes. See the court clerk to pay your fine and to retrieve your personal belongings. Bailiff, please call the next case.

Maddie claimed her personal belongings and left the courtroom. In the hallway, she was approached by a man in uniform, whom she recognized from the jail.

Officer Smith: He said to tell you that the car is at the EZ Parking lot, right down the street. He also said to tell you to get some sleep, and he would speak to you sometime this afternoon.

Officer Smith: No ma'am. He seemed pretty excited about some case, and he had some guy with him. Little, scruffy, looked like he had just gotten out of bed……..

Maddie smiled, and left the courthouse. Walking down the street, she examined the parking ticket that Officer Smith had given her. The car had been clocked into the parking garage at 6:10 this morning. What on earth could David be up to? She turned the ticket to the reverse side, and read aloud the words written in the familiar handwriting.

Maddie: Hello…………..oh, Agnes, hi………….no, I thought you might be Mr. Addison……..yes, I'm fine - but very tired. I figured I'd get a few hours sleep and see how I feel……OK, I guess. I've got to do five days community service, starting tomorrow…….no, I'm not sure what I'll be doing. I guess I'll find out tomorrow……..I really need to speak to Mr. Addison if he's there……oh, OK, well, if he calls in, let him know I'm looking for him, please…….oh, he already did, huh?…….to check on me?? Well, OK, thanks. I'll speak to you soon.

Maddie hangs up the phone, rises slowly, and makes her way up the stairs to the bedroom. She smiles as she spots the traces of David in the room - closet door hanging ajar, socks balled up on the rug, light blue shirt hanging on the chair.

In fact, if she were to admit it, David was everywhere - her thoughts, her dreams, her plans. The note on the parking ticket, the telephone call from Agnes - just more evidence of his love and devotion.

Maddie flips on the radio, and walks across the room. She goes to the chair, picks up David's shirt and holds it against her cheek, inhaling the familiar scent of him. She carries it with her into the bathroom.

She emerges moments later, wearing only David's shirt. She crawls into the bed, leaning back against the pillows, as Barbra Streisand's voice emanates from the radio. She smiles as she hears the words to one of her favorite songs….who says there's no such thing as kismet????

Bert is behind the wheel. He is rumpled, and looks as if he has been roused from bed. But there is an almost rabid energy about him, an eagerness to forge on.

David sits in the passenger seat, slumped against the door. He has a day's growth of beard, and a glazed look in his eyes, difficult to see as his eyelids keep drooping closed.

Bert: Hey boss, are we ever going to get moving on this? I can understand that you wanted to sit outside the jail until we were sure that Miss Hayes got out OK. Then, I know we had to move to the courthouse, and make sure she was released, and that she got the car out of the parking lot. But now, don't you think we should start working on this case? Got any other ideas on leads?

Bert: But sir, we can't give up! We've got to find the person who is smearing the name, besmirching the character of our Miss Hayes………

David: Hey, caffeine boy, chill! I'm not giving up…just regrouping. I'm just beat. It's been a really long and strange twenty-four hours.

Bert: Yeah, I bet. I don't know how you keep it all under control, sir. If my dear, sweet Agnes had been in jail, branded a criminal, a felon - well, I don't know what I would do!

David: Bert, let me ask you something? What if it had been Agnes in this situation? Wouldn't you have tried to get her out of it - wanted to help her?

Bert: What I mean, sir, is we're both men - compadres….traditional, old-fashioned guy's guys who'd like to take care of our women - solve all their problems.

Bert: Yeah……it's part of this whole eighties thing. And I'm not saying it's easy. But sometimes you just gotta step back. See if this makes any sense - sometimes Agnes wants me, and sometimes she needs me. Sometimes Agnes wants to need me, and sometimes she needs to want me. Sometimes……..

Bert: OK, to simplify, I let Agnes know I am there for her if she needs me, but unless she's sick or in danger, I tread carefully before I barge into her business. I respect the fact that she is smart enough to know when she needs and wants my help.

Bert: I think that life would be pretty boring if every two people who fell in love traded in their individuality. Do you wanna give up your Saturday night poker games for Miss Hayes' yoga classes? Why would you want to change Miss Hayes? Isn't what makes Miss Hayes Miss Hayes what you fell in love with?

David: Forget it…..sounds like I might have a little bit to learn about women. Who'd've thunk it? And that I'd be learning it from you?

Bert: Mr. Addison, you flatter me. It's just that I got to step into the line of fire a little earlier than you. I'm happy to share my battle scars.

Bert: Don't mention it, sir. There is nothing that I wouldn't do for you and Miss Hayes. It is but a repayment of a mere fraction of the debt I owe you. Why if it weren't for you, I would never have become Blue Moon's chief investigator.

David: Not much of anything. What she actually said was that I should know that Maddie wasn't crazy - some stretch, huh? - and that I should follow up on the Beamer.

David: Whoa, Bert! You're better connected than the Cosa Nostra. Looks like you will be covering most of the angles. You haven't left much for me to do.

David: What are you talking about? Who writes your dialogue? Tell the writers to cut about 20 percent of your words, and just write plain English.

Bert: Are you trying to cut my part, sir? Is that what happens when you become a big star…….try to cut the little people's lines?

Bert: What can I tell you? I'm very apprehensive. I would rather crawl through sewers, rustle through attics, talk to almost anybody else……………

David: Forget it. I will be happy to deal with the ladies. My connection at the jail should be able to get me the skinny on their whereabouts.

Bert: Maybe those hookers need to get a union. My contacts sure work better hours. I can make some calls and get moving on this right now.

David: Some other time, Bert. I'm just gonna drop in for a couple of hours to catch up, then I'll head over to Maddie's to check on her before I go out streetwalking.

David: Can't avoid life….gotta work this out and move forward…whether we solve this case or not. There's something much bigger at stake.

David enters the room, and leans against the door, watching Maddie sleep. She is sprawled in the center of the bed, the covers and pillows in some disarray, as if her sleep has been restless.

Her face is flushed, and she lies on her side. David sits on the side of the bed, next to her, still just watching. As if the impulse to touch is just too much to resist, he reaches over to brush a strand of hair out of her face. His hand lingers on her hair.

Maddie: No, that's not true. I put on your shirt because I wanted to feel you, smell you….and you weren't here. It was the next best thing.

David: I have to admit - you do a lot more for that shirt than I ever did. There's nothing so sexy as a beautiful woman wearing nothing but a man's shirt. I am correct - nothing but my shirt, right?

Maddie: David, this relationship thing is something I'm having a hard time getting settled into. I've been on my own for such a long time - it's difficult to realize that I need and want to have you involved in so many things that I used to keep to myself. But I do - and I need you to keep reminding me that we are a team, in all aspects of our lives. And I need you to keep me balanced, to make me laugh at myself, and make me happy. And to let me make you happy. And to tell me you love me and make me believe it……even when I am not very loveable.

David: I'm banging my head against the wall. A smart lady like you - you should see that I love you every time I look at you, every time I touch you, every time I kiss you.

David: Maddie, I never meant to infer that you couldn't make your own decisions, or that I could make better ones for you - with my track record ? Ha! I hope I am not that kind of macho jerk! But I really acted like one yesterday, and I apologize. I fell in love with a bright, decisive logical woman…..and you, honey, fell in love with someone who's a bit of a whack job sometimes. But I don't think either one of us wants to change the other - I think we both just need to get better at sharing…... at letting the other one in. I can't picture my life without you -I want to do everything I can to make sure we are sharing for a long, long time.

Maddie: I remember once, a long time ago, I said, "If people are meant to be together, they'll find each other, no matter where, no matter when." When we are old and gray…….. when we are sitting in our rocking chairs…… I want to remember this moment. I love you, David.

As they kiss, David's hand traces down the shirtfront, and starts to fumble with the buttons. As their passion becomes more intense, they pause for a moment, and look deeply into each other's eyes. Maddie's fingers tangle in his hair, and she lets her head fall back. Heat radiates through her body everywhere he touches her. She pulls him to her, down onto the bed.

We see Maddie's gold BMW coming down the street. A shot inside shows David driving slowly, looking both left and right as if he is searching for something - or someone. Music plays, but it is low and nondescript. As he drives, he drums on the steering wheel with his fingers. He is obviously impatient and a little distracted. If the info Smitty gave him is correct, he should be spotting Maddie's former cellmates any time now!

But the last thing on earth he wants to be doing tonight is riding around Los Angeles, looking for a hooker. He smiles contentedly to himself. There are many people out on Hollywood Boulevard, searching in the black night - looking for sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Thank God, he wasn't one of them! All he needed to do was to finish up this little bit of business, return to Maddie's, and climb back into bed with his own pretty woman.

Their reunion had been amazing - being with Maddie always felt like coming home to him. And it looked like, it felt like they were on the right track again. No more detours…roadblocks!

That's why he was out here in the early hours of the A.M. - for Maddie. He knew she wouldn't be satisfied until they got to the bottom of this business with the car. And since David had talked with the girls outside the jail, he knew her suspicions had some foundation. David could smell a case…..and so did Maddie. She had smelled something fishy from the very beginning, and although he would never admit it to her, sometimes Maddie's gut instincts were better than his own! And the way she was hanging on to this one - like a person hanging on the edge of a cliff-scrabbling to hang on to the sliding pebbles - well, he owed it to her to try and get this resolved.

He had had a few moments of caution as he had dressed, standing by the bed watching while she slept. He had almost awakened her to bring her along, or at least to tell her what he was going to do. But he couldn't bring himself to do it - she had had such a bad couple of days, and she started her community service first thing in the morning.

So he had left a note on his pillow (no dummy, he!), and hoped she would understand why he was doing this without consulting her. He hoped to arrive back in time to wake her in the morning and give her some good news.

David continues to drive down the boulevard. He comes into the busier part - shops, eateries, porno theatres, massage parlors. At each corner is a small group of women - a group of businesswomen whose business was to provide pleasure. They are dressed to attract attention.

All at once he catches a glimpse, a flash of red hair, and recognizes one of the hookers from the jail cell. It is the oldest of the three, the one who had obviously been the leader.

David: I need her to help me solve a case. I'm a private detective. She led me to believe that she had some information that could help.

Hooker #1: Listen, Mr. BMW, I know exactly what information you are talking about. And I know that if she spills to you, she puts herself in a hell of a spot. Can you take care of her?

Hooker #1: Get her the hell out of here. She's only been here for a few weeks, and she's just plain wrong for this life. I've seen lots of innocents like her before. She's gonna get herself hurt - or worse.

Hooker #1: Yeah, I'm Mother friggin' Theresa. So tell me, big guy, can you get her out of here and back on the bus to Out-in-the-Sticksville, where she belongs?

Hooker #1: Drive around the block. By the time you get back, I'll have her here. Her name's Lori, and she really is a babe in the woods. Don't let me down, Slick!

David pulls the car away, and circles the block. When he returns to the same corner, Lori stands waiting there for him. She opens the door and sits in the passenger seat.

Suddenly, the car doors swing open, and both David and Lori are yanked out of the BMW. The car is surrounded by cop cars, and a man, who is obviously a plainclothes detective flashes a badge.

The room contains no furniture but a square wooden table and chairs. One wall of the room is entirely covered by a large mirror. David sits on one of the chairs, his elbows on the table, and his head in his hands.

David: What the hell is this….Entertainment Tonight? If you really need to know, I haven't since I was seventeen years old back in Philly. I'm not accustomed to having to pay for female companionship.

Detective: OK, Mr. Addison, I can understand your impatience. But you're here because we believe you have some information on another crime that has been perpetrated against some other innocent people.

Detective: And would you mind telling me how you came up with a full house four times that evening? Did you happen to have a few cards up your sleeve……trying to pull a fast one on your old buddies?

The detective begins to laugh uproariously as he bangs three times on the wall. The door opens, and David's friend, Smitty, walks in.

David: Smitty, you son of a ……………I've been sitting here, cooling my heels, while you two were playing bad cop/lousy cop games. I'm gonna kick your keister from here to Santa Barbara.

Smitty: Hey Dave, they just got hold of me an hour ago, and I was picking up your Beamer at the impound lot. I arrived right before Doug came in here. We just thought we would play a little joke on you.

Detective: Careful, Addison. Officer Smith here is your only hope. Good thing you explained your plan to him, or you would be taking up more permanent residence in a cell downstairs.

Detective: She takes good direction, I grant you. Never opened her mouth except to give us her name. Since we can't get anything on her either, you're both free to go.

Maddie, holding a cup of coffee, is pacing her living room. She pauses near the piano, and picks up the note - the one she found in her bed instead of David when she woke up this morning! Rereading it for perhaps the tenth time, she finds no additional clues to David's whereabouts. She wonders if she should call a cab to take her to the Parker Center, or if she should wait for David to return.

Maddie: A mysterious David always makes me nervous. It's not that I don't trust him - just that it's like waiting for the other shoe to drop. David Addison - poster boy for Murphy's Law!

She reacts with alarm as the noise becomes deafening - it sounds like they are coming right into the living room. She runs to the front door and flings it open.

From the back, she sees David and a young girl with long, brown hair. David waves the two police cruisers away, and as they turn, Maddie recognizes the girl from the jail cell.

David: Lori, Maddie is going to take care of you while I try to get my act together to take it on the road. Why don't you freshen up - we have lots to talk about later.

He flashes Maddie a grin that she can feel down to her toes. She stands silently as she regains her composure. She looks over at Lori, who looks very young and very lost.

Maddie: C'mon Lori, let's get you settled in the guest room. I've only got a short time before I need to go, and I'd like to talk to David for a few minutes.

Maddie makes Lori comfortable in the guest room, fills a large mug of coffee, and goes upstairs to her bedroom. She enters the bathroom, where we can hear the shower running.

The water stops, and after a few moments, David emerges from the shower, damp and full of refreshed enthusiasm. He grabs the coffee and takes a hefty swallow.

David: OK, here goes. The other night, outside the jail, Lori hinted to me that she had some information about crimes involving gold BMWs.

David: Yeah, Smitty had given me a lead on where to look for her. I didn't want to wake you - figured that you could use an uninterrupted night of sleep.

David: So nothing. We came right here and didn't have a chance to talk about anything. I figured we'd drop you off, and I'll find out what I can.

David: Well, that's another thing we need to talk about. I made a promise to Bobbi -- that's your redheaded roommate from the other night. I told her I would do my best to get Lori off the streets and back home.

David drives and Maddie is in the passenger seat. Lori sits in the back seat, curled up in a corner. She wears a pair of sweats, compliments of Maddie. She is swallowed up by the clothing, which makes her seem even smaller and more vulnerable.

David and Maddie share a look and David silently mouths the word "manager". Maddie shakes her head slightly, and puts her finger on her lips to keep him quiet.

Lori: I've heard him say it many times. "Those damned cops are stupid - looking for broken down cars and sleezy looking drug dealers." He's bought a fleet of gold BMWs, and insists on very professional looking guys in their early twenties to drive and handle the deals.

Lori: No, these guys really are presentable. Carlos and his crew are experts at picking up people who have hit rock bottom, who are at the end of their ropes. He says that the computer age has been his biggest success.

Lori: There are lots of hungry, desperate young guys out there since the dot coms have started going south. They're still looking for the big bucks, and it's amazing what some people will do when they get in over their heads.

Lori: Hey, don't feel sorry for me - I'm not as naïve as I look. So what if I couldn't make it as a model….I'll do just fine. I land on my feet.

David: Lori, let us make this clear to you. You're helping us and jeopardizing yourself - and we understand that. We won't leave you high and dry. When this is all settled, we're gonna have a talk about your future.

Maddie: Lori, let's do this. You think about it, and we'll get this case resolved. David here has been appointed your guardian angel, and it's a job he doesn't take lightly - let me assure you.

Maddie: Don't act so innocent, Evel Knievel. I've got your number. Remember, drug runners, even Ivy League drug runners, have nice shiny guns. I don't have to tell you how upset I'd be if you get a hole in that shirt.

Maddie: David, I mean it. No unnecessary risks. When you and Bert are together, sometimes it gets just a little too Starsky and Hutch. Be careful - don't forget you've got Lori along for the ride.

David: Sweetheart, you have no idea. You saw that scene at the jail the other night. Sometimes we yell louder than the announcer at the WWF.

David: I can't remember when I didn't love that lady. For a short while, I walked the edge, fighting the inevitable, and then - ba bing -- I tumbled faster than acrobats at the circus. It's taken a lot to make it work for both of us - but in all that time - the feelings were always there.

David: Yeah, if the prince acts like a jerk once in a while, and the princess gets cranky if she doesn't get her space. It's life, Lori, and if the plusses are greater than the minuses, we've got it made! You, too!

David: Wait till Act VI….you'll see. Meanwhile, we need to get rolling. I think we need another half of a detective to get this job done - let's go get Bert.

David pulls up at the curb, and leans on the horn. We see the front door open, and what looks like a walking pile of books and papers heads towards the car. A hand reaches out to grapple with the door handle. The door flies open, a cascade of notebooks and sheaves of computer paper fall into the car, and reveal Bert. He is wild eyed, and starts to ramble on immediately.

Bert: Hey, Mr. Addison, I've been up all night working on this. Look at all this information I got from my sources - lots of analysis that I think we can use.

David: Bert, this is Lori. She's one of the ladies that I told you I met with the other night. She has been able to give me some information on the gold BMWs.

He again begins to shuffle the piles, creating a new avalanche of papers all around the car. David bats sheets of computer paper out of his face.

Bert: There are over 4000 1985 gold BMWs in the greater Los Angeles area, no two owned by the same person. Most of the owners had a median income…legitimate income of over $100,000 a year, so it doesn't seem that they would be thieves, or drug dealers.

Bert: So it seems that it may be just a random car that was confused with Miss Hayes' car. Although an analysis of license plate numbers does not find a plate with any more than 3 similar numbers to the one………

David: The Beamer ahead of us has the same license plate number as we do. And I will give you weird squared……there is another one following us with….guess what??? The same license plate.

David: Good guess, Joe Hardy. You and Nancy Drew there just sit still, and look cool, while I try to figure out what we should do here.

David: It seems to me, whatever operation they've got going here, they expected five cars. It looks like they've lost one - goodie for us! I say we just go with it, and see where we end up.

David: All right everybody, stay sharp and pay attention. The highway narrows to two lanes up ahead. We have to be careful and watch what the other cars do.

The car on the right merges in front of David, as the car behind pulls into the left lane. This leaves Maddie's car trailing, at the rear of the group of five.

On the right, a work crew is cleaning trash from the side of the road. Prisoners in orange jumpsuits carry pointed sticks and trash bags. As the car slows, it stops almost directly across from a familiar looking blonde, who is wiping her forehead with the sleeve of the orange jumpsuit.

David: Just follow along until we find out what they're doing. Look, Maddie, check out the license plates of the other cars. Nope, you're not seeing double.

David: OK, hang on, this could be it - looks like we're turning off. Bert, get on the horn to Smitty, and give him our location. Tell him to make sure they're picking up the signal from that Lojack.

David: This is the way that it is going to go down. We're going to try and stay in the car until the police get here. Just in case that's not possible, Maddie, you and Lori need to hit the floor now.

David: Maddie, I don't have the time to go through a competency hearing with you right now. You said you knew the difference between caring and overprotection…..and right now, you are just a big old orange target. Just listen to me and stay down!

Bert: Sir, good news. Smitty said they've got Carlos, and he has confessed to the whole operation. They should be right behind us, and can search all the cars.

Maddie and Lori get down on the floor as instructed. David pulls the car into the enclosed parking lot, and the other drivers stop, and start to exit their vehicles. It looks to the world like a business meeting - young well dressed executives in their Brooks Brothers suits. The group of four head towards Maddie's BMW, where Bert and David exchange anxious glances.

Now standing outside the car, David, Maddie, and Lori watch as the drivers are handcuffed, and bags of drugs are removed from the trunk of each car. Bert walks back to the car from his conference with the police, and turns to David.

Bert: Smitty said he can wait till tomorrow to get statements from you and Miss Hayes, but he'd like to get them from Lori, and I tonight.

David: Funny. Well, Smitty said there will probably be a sizeable reward for these guys. What do you say we use it to help Lori set up a new life for herself, maybe college tuition, maybe trade school, whatever she wants? She is still young enough to put this all behind her. Whaddya say?

Maddie lunges for him, and he gathers her in a bear hug. He strokes her back, and they stand locked together in the middle of the parking lot, with all the activity going on around them. They finally pull apart reluctantly.

David: Who'd've thunk it? Your little traffic summons helped uncover a major drug ring. Gotta hand it to you, Maddie, your persistence certainly paid off.