Walking My Baby Back Home

Close up of a woman's arms and hands. She wears long black sleeves, and carries a letter. She reaches for the door of the mailbox, pulls it down, and places the letter on the ledge. Close up on the addresses.

The hands push the door of the mailbox closed, sliding the letter down the chute. We then follow the letter through a variety of scenes - it is picked up by the mailman, goes by truck to the post office, goes through automatic sorting, back into a different mailman's pouch, to an office mail cart, and onto a pile on Agnes DiPesto's desk.

Agnes goes through the stack of mail, sorting it into piles. She picks up one of the piles, and walks towards David Addison's door. She knocks on the door.

Agnes opens the door. David is sitting in his chair, feet propped on the desk. His eyes are looking towards the ceiling and dart back and forth around the room. Agnes watches him for a moment.

David: See the little bugger? He's over there…….now over there! Didja ever wonder what the buzz is on flies, Agnes?

David: Fascinating stuff….born into a family with about a zillion siblings, Mom and Pop take off before you get your wings…..called a pest…a lowlife…….never being able to overcome a bad reputation.

David: Course you gotta look at the flip side…Not a bad life altogether….eating, drinking, and making more flies. …..no bills to pay, no clients to see, no mail to read……

David: BUT…..how about this…this always "bugs' me. Did ya ever get a fly in the car with you - and he just hangs in with you for the ride - like twenty miles or so?

David: So you get there, he gets out of the car and realizes he's in a whole new neighborhood. Like a fly kidnapping…or a fly relocation program. He's gotta miss his friends and family. Can't find his favorite eating place. Lassie went home, but I bet that fly can't. I think their life span is only about a half of a TVLand marathon anyway.

David: And a suburban fly…….if you drive him into the city - he's gotta know how to handle himself with the tough fly gangs. There are just so many problems for the ordinary fly.

David: So what have we here? Three Stooges Fan Club……..Hair Club for Men - that Richie's a real joker……… St Philomena Elementary School… Huh? Why would that be coming here?

He opens the envelope, and withdraws a letter, reading it carefully. He lays it on the desk, and stares out the window.

Maddie: What do you want? Whenever we revert to that boss/associate mode, I've noticed you've always got your hand out.

David: Not fair - what an opening. Listen, that was entirely too easy. Let's say each one of you make up your own response to that line.

David: Is that so? How about later tonight, we play a little fantasy game I made up? You be the boss and I'll be the bad, bad associate and……

David: Hell yes, spent a few good years playing that game in my head. Funny - it always led to another game - or shall I say activity. Strictly solo!

David: Anyway, it wouldn't be the same playing with the "new you". I still do a double take every time I walk in here……hmm, come to think of it, might just get a little mileage out of that…….kinda new, kinda dangerous…….kinda WOW!

Maddie: I'm pretty sure that's a compliment, so I'm just going to say thank you and move on. Let's get back to what you want from me.

David: No, that's generally the one you ask someone else to scratch, so don't get too cocky with me, sister. Anyway, I do want to ask you something.

David: Don't gloat, Miss Smarty Pants. What I wondered, is if you could possibly do without me around here for a few days…maybe a week?

David: Nope, Jergenson. He always falls for that rock, paper, scissors thing. But, I just got an interesting letter from a nun in Philadelphia.

David: This particular nun is an old flame of mine….Mickie Berardi, the cutest tomboy in the eighth grade. She was second base.

David: Madolyn, I ought to wash out that mind with soap! She played second base on our baseball team. She had a great arm…..and some great other parts too, as I recall.

David: Mickie's the principal at our old grade school. They're having some kind of a reunion. I got the invitation about a month ago and I tossed it. But there's something in the letter….just can't put my finger on it. She's practically begging me to come……See, another woman begging me for something!

David: I don't know…….I always thought a reunion would be kind of lame. But who knows? I'd like to see Mickie…some of the old gang…see how they turned out………..at least the ones who aren't in prison.

David: Next weekend. I figured I could leave Monday, come back the following Sunday…if you think you can do without me.

Maddie: I'm just kidding, Addison. Why would I need to do without you? Things are pretty manageable around here right now - Agnes and Bert can hold down the fort. Besides, I think we're due for a vacation, don't you?

David: Maddie, Maddie, Maddie….why wouldn't I want you there? I'm just surprised you'd want to spend a vacation in Philadelphia - you're more a St. Tropez or Maui kind of gal.

Maddie: David, it'll be another kind of adventure. I think an expedition to the origins of David Addison could be very enlightening. Who knows what I might dig up on you?

Maddie: I'm going to be very interested to see some of the places you've told me about - see if they really compare.

Maddie: Well, I still want to go. I want to meet some of your friends. I can stand a couple of nights in bars and bowling alleys.

David: Very funny - you know what, Maddie? You're right, you should come to Philadelphia. You can see the vacant lot where I played stickball as a child…..the place by the lake where we went on Saturday nights to watch the submarine races……the historical sights where old love `em and leave `em Dave took girls so they'd think I was deep……..

Maddie: Listen David, I don't know where this is coming from. Why do I feel like I have to justify wanting to go with you?

David: I'm convinced that you want to go because you feel you should go. But you've got this preconceived notion about me and my life, and I get the feeling you consider yourself just a little bit too high and mighty for it all….like it's some kind of big sacrifice.

David: Hard to believe, ain't it? I must be crazy. Who wouldn't want to waltz into their reunion with the most beautiful eye candy in the city…..the new, but not necessarily improved, Madolyn Hayes?

Maddie: And that's important to you? That you have the proper…..what did you call it………eye candy…….on your arm?

David: And it's very important that you dress kind of slutty, hang all over me, and totally ignore any other guy who tries to talk to you.

David: I'm kidding…….if we weren't running so far behind, I would ask the AD for another take on this whole scene

David: Goldilocks, if you want to come with me, I'm game. I'll take you to Benjamin Franklin's house…show you his kite…….amazing what that guy could do with a little tail.

Maddie: You're pretty lucky you changed the subject, pal. Just remember, I already know how deep you are…….and how deep you can pile it.

Maddie: I guess we should call your Dad and Stephanie - make plans to take them to dinner. And Richie and Amy - find out how the wedding plans are going.

David: The Rittenhouse was always a good one - but ya know… Richie was telling me about this new one they built right across the street from City Hall. City Hall has a statue of William Penn on the top, and Richie says, if you get the right room in this hotel, you can look out the window and get a great peek at old Billy's …uh…..keystone!

Maddie: So, we've decided on the Rittenhouse, right? I'll take care of everything. Maybe I'll go out at lunchtime and buy a guidebook.

David: You're amazing, Blondie. Helluva travel agent! How about we try and get out of here at a reasonable hour tonight, and we'll grab some dinner? Make a list of Philadelphia's not to be missed?

David: I've got a few things to go over with Bert. I'll break it to him gently, so he doesn't sharpen up his El Duce routine.

I'm sitting here trying to imagine the stories you've had to concoct, to talk your way out of getting a letter from a nun. Hope you didn't have too much trouble explaining it to the Blue Moon Shampoo Girl.

Don't look around, there are no hidden cameras. When I ran into your father after Mass on Sunday, he gave me the lowdown on "my son, the big shot L.A. private eye." You should have seen him, proud as could be. I'm glad all is well with you and your dad - who'd've thunk it?

Anyway, the reason for this letter. I want you to come to this reunion, David. The whole gang will be there, and it won't be the same without you. If you need me to lay on some guilt (a nun specialty, as you might remember), let me remind you that I was grounded for a whole summer because of you. And if you need threats (specialty number two) - I won't hesitate to tell your girlfriend why.

David, please come. I really could use some familiar faces around me. It's been ten years since you've been back - I need to see if you've still got that evil twinkle in your eye, and that smirk on your face.

David: Bert, Bert……turn down the rpms. This has nothing to do with Magillicuddy, unless there's something you…..

Bart: A vacation? How wonderful, sir. A getaway, full of fire and the romance of foreign places. Where have you chosen….Paris, Tahiti, Istanbul?

Bert: And a glorious place it is, sir. When I think of it, I always think of the magnificence of its…..its……..

David: You are just a fountain of information, Viola. I'll bring you back a book of fun facts about Philly. Meanwhile, let's talk about what happens while we're gone…

David: I don't want to hear about you and Magillicuddy comparing - well, anything. It will probably be a nothing week…just as long as you keep cool.

David: Yep, that too. So I kind of think Maddie has very little to worry about on the old girlfriend front. My fantasies are in color, not black and white.

David: Yeah, but there's something about my family……kinda like a home court disadvantage. And I'm betting that's exactly the way Maddie expects to see them.

David: You have to see where she grew up, Bert - it's like "Leave It to Beaver" meets "Father Knows Best"…….a house you couldn't shake a stick at for less than half a mil…..parents out of some kind of a fairy tale-----well, all I can say is there's a lot more than eight hundred miles between her Chicago and my South Philadelphia.

David: But the thing is…..for the most part - I wouldn't trade the way I grew up for anything. I had a great time when I was a kid - especially while my Mom was still alive.

David: We usually did stuff that was light on the wallet……day trips to the Jersey shore, picnics in Fairmount Park, walks to Ninth Street for water ice and pretzels. I can remember having a whole lot of fun. But she's not gonna see it that way.

David: Did you ever catch her looking at me sometimes - like I have three heads? She's coming to Philadelphia to find out who scrambled my eggs….. who stole the sandwiches from my picnic.

David: You know what - so what? Who cares that I didn't grow up in Hoity Toity, Illinois…….I'm gonna show her a Philadelphia that'll stand her right on her ear.

Maddie: So that's about it. It seems like it's going to be a fairly calm week. I'm sure you and Bert will have no trouble at all keeping up with things.

Maddie: Don't worry Agnes, I know all about it…..I know it's surprising, but Mr. Addison has come clean about that little chapter in Blue Moon's history. And it wasn't your fault, and it wasn't Bert's fault - it was David's and my fault…….and there's no way it's going to happen again. We're too solid for that - both as a company and as a couple.

Agnes: Nope, think you've covered it all. And promising the staff next Friday off for good behavior should insure there will be no problems. So what are you going to do in Philadelphia?

Maddie: Well, I've been reading this guidebook and I never realized that there are so many things to do there. Historical sights, museums, shopping, five star restaurants……..I think it will be great……….of course, I'm sure David will have his own Philadelphia to show me……funny -

Maddie: I get the impression that he is a little nervous about this visit……about taking me on this visit, that is.

Maddie: It reminds me of when we were in Chicago - last year, when my Dad had his heart attack. Don't get me wrong - David was great…….I don't know what I would have done without him. But he was nervous……..kind of uncomfortable…maybe intimidated, believe it or not….like somehow, he didn't belong there.

Agnes: And he saw your house, and the neighborhood and all, right? Maybe that's it - maybe he's nervous that what you're going to see in Philadelphia won't measure up.

Maddie: It's all starting to make sense…….he's afraid I'm going to be judging him - his friends, his home, his neighborhood. I've been teasing him about it…..I just never realized he's been taking it so seriously. I guess I just wasn't listening.

Maddie: Nothing. This issue's come up hundreds of times before - he's beer, I'm champagne…he's roller derby, I'm theatre……he's Porsche - well, actually, I'm Porsche too! But it's ridiculous! You'd think by now he'd get it - how important can it be? It hasn't kept me sleeping by myself at night!

Maddie: I'm sure I won't love everything about David's background…..for goodness sakes, I don't love everything about David ---- and I'm sure he doesn't love everything about me. But we do love each other - two flawed people who've found each other in this crazy world. And that's not going to change….even if I find out that he's been raised by wolves, as he so often proclaims.

Maddie: I hope he knows that…but if he doesn't, there's no sense in trying to tell him. We'll just have to see what happens, and work it out one step at a time, if there are problems.

Maddie: Can't say I haven't learned from my mistakes. Well, Agnes, let's say you and I go out sneak out of here for lunch - let the men think they're running the store.

The camera pans the cabin of the airplane. The flight is only partially full, and most of the passengers are sleeping.

Close up of Maddie. She sits in the aisle seat. She is reading a "Frommer's Guide to Philadelphia". The camera pulls back and reveals David….asleep, lying on his back, folded into the other two seats His head is in Maddie's lap, but otherwise, he is in a clearly uncomfortable position. He moves in his sleep, and whacks his elbow on the seat in front of him. He yelps!

Maddie: First class? You snob! Anyway, sooner or later, we've both got to realize that booking flights at the last minute is not the most economical way to fly. Sorry, you'll just have to rough it….I wasn't spending any more of the Carmichael sisters' fee on airline tickets…….

David: Got it……but when we land, I'll need to make a stop at Doctor Feelgood's --- number one choice of contortionists everywhere.

The flight attendant returns. Without so much as a second glance, David takes the two cups from her. Handing one to Maddie, he taps them together as if to toast.

David (exaggeratedly): Here's to the first face I see in the morning……and to that lovely smile that's only for me…….

David: Isn't that what this is all about? So, tell me about your guidebook, Miss Hayes. What's on your list to see and do?

David: We can run up the front steps….just like Rocky did. And then, down at the Spectrum, there's a Rocky statue. We can probably catch a Sixers game,,,,maybe the Flyers.

Maddie (dryly): I can't wait. And maybe some shopping on Antique Row or South Street…maybe I'll see something for the house.

David: I'll take you to Wanamaker's. Everybody meets there, at the Eagle. I got tossed out of there once. Climbed up on top and sat on the Eagle's head.

David: With fried onions. We'll find out where the hot place to go is. There's Pat's and Geno's - they're right across the street from each other. Been competing for years. The best thing on earth……3 AM, standing on the corner, swaying cause you've had one too many beers, and chowing down on a cheese steak.

David: Or the Mutter Museum…it has a collection of all kinds of oddities…two headed pigs, and all kinds of neat stuff in jars. And there's another museum with the world's largest bucket of teeth. Some of the best school field trips went there.

David: How about the Trocadero…….used to be a burlesque house. Now, all kinds of bands play there. Just a few weeks ago, Richie told me that actor and his band were there……you know who I'm talking about - that bald headed guy, plays the harmonica, thinks he can sing.

David: Shoot for the moon - why not large or extra large! There is one thing I want to do first thing tomorrow though. I would like to go and see Mickie. I don't know how to explain it, but there's something wrong. Her letter just didn't sound right.

Maddie: I should have guessed it…running off to see your old girlfriend, first chance you get. Well, not without me you don't.

David: I am really digging this jealousy bit. Perhaps we should discuss it further…….or not discuss it at all…..when we get to the hotel. Remind you to be grateful for what all those other girls have been missing.

Flight Attendant: We're going to turn on the in flight movie for the two of you that are awake. Just tune in to channel three.

Maddie: Wake me for Die Hard 27…when John McClane has no hair and walks with a cane…….saves the Motion Picture Retirement Home.

David is driving, while Maddie acts like a person in an unfamiliar place - peering out the window and trying to take it all in.

David: Tell it to Thomas Jefferson. Broad Street is really an important street in Philadelphia though. It runs all the way from the Delaware River, through the city, all the way to the northern suburbs. Should have been called Long Street.

Goes through all kinds of neighborhoods - rich, poor, all ethnic areas. But that's not Broad Street's claim to fame.

David: Broad Street is home to the Mummers Parade - where every New Year's Day you'll see everyday roofers and truck drivers - manly men….. real men…..beer drinking, pork rind eating, football watching men - wearing more feathers and make up than you've ever seen in one zip code.

David: Don't worry…I learned to negotiate these streets at a tender age - I can dodge double parked cars at forty miles an hour, and still keep my arm around my best girl. Slide on over here, and I'll prove it to you.

David: In decorating - more is not enough! It looks just like home…I guess that's cause it is. Look up there, Maddie, see that window right up there on the second floor? That was our room…mine and Richie's. And I had the top bunk - with a great view into Mary Kate McCarthy's bedroom - right over there.

David: Call me a voyeur - it sounds nicer. Good old Mary Kate…she was the older woman…..my heart was broken when she married a plumber and moved to Mayfair. I owe her a lot…….including my extensive knowledge of women's undergarments.

David: She had a pet name for me……I think it was maggoty little creep. Her voice was like music when she said it.

Maddie: Oh brother…….. I really like it, David, it's a nice street. Did you want to stop and see anybody? Look up old Mary Kate?

David: No, she probably has let herself go to pot, double chins and all, drinking diet cokes and wondering why she let her golden chances pass her by.

David: Yeah, a guy comes home once in ten years, and his Dad takes off for Jamaica. What are the odds? Good thing I don't have an inferiority complex.

They pull into a small parking lot, which adjoins an equally small church, and school building. They walk through a door into the school. It seems a typical school day - kids in school uniforms in classrooms, and the sounds of children's voices echo through the hall.

He indicates a bench outside the door marked "Principal". There is a small boy, about seven years old, sitting on one end of the bench and staring at the floor.

David: I spent more time there than in any desk in this building. I bet we could dust it for Addison posterior prints.

David: I didn't pull that fire alarm, honest Sister. You know what, I bet? I bet it was one of those miracles you guys are always talking about. Or you know who else it could have been - Satan! That's who did it, I bet!

The woman at the window turns. She is petite, attractive, with a head full of deep coppery curls. She wears a tailored navy suit with a pink blouse.

David: Hate to disappoint you, kiddo - haven't gotten that promotion yet. But you can call me Saint David if you want.

Mickie: I know, poor thing. I've heard about your unfortunate affiliation with this character. Do you realize, Miss Hayes…….

Mickie: Do you realize, Maddie, that the tale he was spouting on the way in here was the same one he tried to use in……..what was it Addison, the sixth grade?

Mickie: Well, Justin, I hope you grow up to be just as good a man as Mr. Addison…but I hope you don't sit on that bench as much as he did.

Mickie: He's our resident charmer…seems to have inherited the title from someone we know. Now let me talk to Maddie for a minute. How are you liking Philadelphia?

Maddie: Very much, at least what I've seen. In places, it's a lot like Chicago, but it seems to have a feeling all its own.

Mickie: It's great, all right - I'd never live anywhere else. I think it's the neighborhoods that give Philadelphia its charm. David, make sure you give Maddie the ten cent tour…….but don't let him take you to the Mutter Museum.

Mickie: And let me tell you what a disadvantage that is when you're running a PTA meeting with some of those very same people you played with.

Mickie: I wouldn't trade one single minute of it. We didn't have a lot of things - money, clothes, toys, but we did have fun.

Mickie: Yes, it's not easily evident to see, but the programs are starting to be a drain on the church funds, and this has never been the case before.

Mickie: This is not a rich parish, so any programs outside the basic have to be self-supporting. That goes way back. That means that, let's say for baseball, which is our next sport to begin, a child's registration fee has to cover everything - uniforms, maintenance and upkeep of the fields, league fees etc. Sometimes we get donations from businesses in the area, but mostly we're on our own.

Mickie: You're not Catholic, are you? I'm sorry, Maddie, that wasn't a snipe….but a cardinal rule of a Catholic parish is never pay for help you can get for free. Most of our programs are run by volunteers.

Mickie: As well as the entire bookkeeping system. And all the arrangements that go along with all the sports programs. Basically, all I've ever had to do is show up and cheer…..a perfect system. Until about a month ago, that is.

Mickie: I started to get phone calls, inquiring politely about when we were going to pay for things we've had done - a major overhaul on the field, a large uniform order, a few others. At first, I just assumed it was an oversight and referred them to the athletic committee. But then there were repeat phone calls. I took the time and listened. It seems most of our major bills have not been paid for over six months. A couple things were especially disturbing - the money for the field work was donated by a parishioner…..I accepted the check myself, and I know it has been cashed.

Mickie: That's the hard part……this has to be handled very discreetly. The Catholic church and scandal definitely don't mix. In fact, I`d prefer that nobody else know a single thing about this, except for the three of us.

Maddie: Let's try it this way…can you give us a list of the people who have access to the books? We can do some background investigation…see if it looks like one of them has acquired some extra money recently - new car, fur coat, big vacation.

Mickie pulls some files, and starts to make a list. David is standing looking out the window, and Maddie walks over to join him. They watch the kids, running, laughing, playing jump rope.

David: Know what I've always wanted to do? Take a whole bunch of dollar bills, and stand in the middle of a group full of kids and toss it in the air.

Mickie: I'm not kidding, David. The insurance company would be on me like a duck on a bug if I let you do anything like that.

Mickie: Why don't you come to our assembly on Friday? We're showing a movie -if you want to toss your money around, I'll let you buy a round for the house - soft pretzels and orange drink for all.

Mickie: OK, here are the names. Just three people, so it shouldn't be too much work. I don't know how to thank you two.

David: Our investigator - haha. Remember Stinky O'Brian……Mick, this guy looks just like him….only with obscene amounts of facial hair.

David: Thought maybe I'd give Maddie a tour around the old neighborhood - show her Ninth Street, go down around the stadiums, maybe Roosevelt Park.

Mickie: Have you ever been to Roosevelt Park in the daytime, Addison? Don't buy any of that stuff about submarine races on the lake, Maddie.

Mickie: You've never been there in the daytime either, Addison. But, I'm sorry, I can't. I've got a Confirmation meeting, and then another with the reunion committee to go over the final details. We'll find some time before the end of the week, I promise.

Maddie is seated at a vanity, fully dressed, putting on makeup. David is sprawled across the bed, sheets wound around him. We hear a noise, and he begins to stir. Maddie gets up and opens the drapes, and the sunlight streams in.

David: And we will. But later. C'mon Maddie, Viola won't even be in the office for four hours. We can't get the background information till then anyway.

David: That's what I'm doing, getting down to business. Anyway, those clothes aren't right for the undercover thing I have in mind, anyway…….. and speaking of under the covers…….

Both are sporting a very different look than the previous day. David is clad all in black - boots, jeans, muscle shirt with a respectable exhibition of chest hair, under a black leather jacket. Maddie is the big surprise here….hair teased as big as it was in season 1…….wearing tight black jeans, spiked heels, a sparkling silver belt, and a tight cropped top.

David: Trust me Maddie, this is gonna work. Look, you're decked out in the best that K-Mart had to offer. How can we lose?

David: Well, it's basically open and shut…..this is probably the dumbest case we've ever had….and that's saying something. I have no idea how this Dougherty guy thought he was gonna get away with this. Must be stupid.

David: Anyway…..just follow my lead……you just have to act like the proud Mama - nothing is to good or too expensive for your little darling. I'll do the rest.

David pulls the car up in front of a small corner insurance office. As they enter, a bell rings, and a voice comes from the back.

Maddie and David look around the room. It is outfitted with very generic metal office furniture….one desk and two chairs. It is purely a functional office - no thought has been given to decorating. David is examining a certificate on the wall when a man enters from an adjoining room. He first sights Maddie.

Maddie starts to open her mouth, but David walks up behind her and grabs her around the waist. As he begins to speak, Maddie turns to gape at him……he is transformed into a swaggering tough guy with a heavy Philadelphia accent.

He indicates one of the chairs, and seats himself in the other one. He leans forward, legs spread, and his elbows on his knees.

Dougherty: You know about this volunteer stuff…sometimes you have to take care of it when you can. And believe it or not, sometimes I make some good business contacts from this as well. Everybody needs insurance.

David: Yeah, I grew up here, but the missus and I met in California, and we settled down there for a while. Gave it a shot, but it's just too weird for me out there……especially trying to raise a boy. So we're back, and we need to get Rocco settled on a team.

David: She's a proud Mom, what can you do? Pat, the kid is a natural. He has been chosen for the All Stars for every single team he's ever played on. In his last school, at ten years old, he was playing on the team with the eighth graders. I tell you, Pat, this kid is gonna be in the Bigs, mark my word.

Dougherty: Then we should be glad to have him. There are an awful lot of talented kids on this team, I've just got to warn you.

David: You're the coach, right. Along with the treasurer of the athletic department? So let's make a little deal. Where's the papers we gotta fill out?

David and Dougherty walk out the door. Maddie stands and tries to watch them out the window. When they walk out of her sightline, she returns to the chair, furiously trying to yank down the too small top. She sits and begins to fabricate answers for the paperwork.

Dougherty: I'm not originally from here……my wife grew up in the neighborhood. But I like it….and the location's good - only ninety minutes from Wildwood.

Dougherty: I just bought a house in North Wildwood……it's gonna be tight for a while, but there's nothing like a place at the shore.

David: You can say that again. So, Pat, let's talk about this baseball team. We gotta find a spot for my kid. What's the registration fee?

David ostentatiously pulls out a large wad of bills held by a gold money clip. He peels off three hundred dollar bills and holds them out in front of Dougherty.

David: Good man. Let's not discuss this little arrangement with the wife……she doesn't understand how business works, what a man has to do to make it in this world.

They approach the door of the office and enter. Maddie makes a large production of chewing on the end of the pencil and looking perplexed.

Maddie: Honey, I forgot his birth certificate. Is that a big deal? Look this over and see if I've got everything right?

Dougherty: No problem. I'll be talking with you sometime next week to let you know about practice. Until then, it's been a pleasure…….Bruno, Carol…..

David: Had a little chat with the guy….man to man. Just bought a house at the Jersey shore that might be just a little beyond his means. I feel it in my gut, this is the guy who's trying to hoodwink Mickie.

Maddie: We need to decide exactly the right way to pursue this now……logically, sensibly - leaving out that "macho" attitude that you are remembering all too well.

Maddie: I know you Addison…….you'd like nothing more than to charge ahead on your own, nail this guy, and get back at him for what he's done to Mickie. But that's not what Mickie wants….this has to be handled quietly, discreetly. If it ends up on the front page of the newspaper, it does her no good at all.

Maddie: Me too. Listen, partner, it's getting late, and I refuse to meet Richie and Amy looking like this. We need to get back to the hotel and change for dinner.

The rental car pulls up in the vicinity of a beautiful building…….a large white monument, flooded with lights. David, Maddie, Richie and Amy emerge from the car.

Richie: The only thing you're gonna show her here is how to get mugged. This place has changed a lot since you used to live in the city.

David: Amy, is he always such a pain in the posterior? Can't I show the lady one of my fond childhood memories without you being a jerk? Sit in the car if you don't want to be out here.

David: Yeah, maybe. I still think they are a little too gaga over this wedding and everything. It's a train wreck waiting to happen.

Maddie: Well that's not likely…since you are the best man, and I'm a newly ordained bridesmaid. That caught me by surprise.

Maddie: No it's fine. What's one more overdone bridesmaid dress in my closet? Or I could have faith….maybe Amy will be the perfect bride and pick something nice. Of course, the smart bride picks the ugly dresses, so she isn't overshadowed on her big day.

David: I'll remind you that you said that……….disaster follows Richie like a bloodhound. Mark my words, something will go wrong.

David: Something really cool. That's Memorial Hall. It was built to honor the Civil War heroes. The building has been used for all different kinds of things - I played some basketball here when I was a kid. I think it's pretty much abandoned now. But what I want to show you is down here.

David: It has to do with the way it's constructed - the curve. Voices roll around the curve, and if you sit at one end, you can hear everything that is being said from the other end, even if it is whispered. Look I'll show you. Sit right there, and I'll walk over to the other side.

Maddie sits on the bench and all at once, gets a curious expression on her face. She motions for David to sit beside her. They can hear voices.

Richie, just calm down. You get so nuts about your brother. (seductively) Can't you think of anything else you'd like to do while we're alone in the dark?

David: So, I guess you've figured out the concept of the whispering bench? We sure had a lot of fun with that as teenagers. Guess Rich forgot how it works.

Pat Dougherty sits at his desk, when he hears the bell on the opening door. He looks up and smiles at Sister Mickie Berardi, who has just entered.

Mickie: Mr. Dougherty, Mr. Addison is an old friend of mine, who I have asked here to help me with a problem I seem to be having.

Maddie: What Mr. Addison means, Mr. Dougherty, is that you know as well as we do, that you accepted three hundred dollars from him the other day, in order to guarantee our "son" a place on the baseball team. Now if we have misinterpreted, and that three hundred dollars represented registration fees and such, well then, we owe you an apology. All you need to do is show us the entries in the books that shows that money was deposited to the parish athletic account.

Dougherty: After all this time…after all the time I've volunteered and all the things I've done for the church, my word isn't good enough?

David: OK, pal, then you'd better pick up that phone and get a good attorney, because you've got a lot of explaining to do. We're not just talking about three hundred dollars here, and you know it.

Maddie: Mr. Dougherty, we've got some pretty definitive proof here that in excess of eighteen thousand dollars has been embezzled from the athletic fund in the last six months - money that should have gone to pay bills for uniforms and field repairs…bills that are still unpaid, although the money earmarked for them is missing. This doesn't include any other cash payments, similar to the ones you took from Mr. Addison on Wednesday.

Maddie: Oh, but you're wrong Mr. Dougherty. We've got some pretty interesting deposits to your personal checking account, similar amounts to what we're talking about here. They seem to be right around the time you purchased your shore house. Coincidental? I think not.

Maddie: And, we also have information that seems to indicate a rather sudden move from your last home in Phoenix, after a similar incident happened in a Catholic church there. Shall I go on?

David: Unless you don't need those teeth anymore, you'd better not think of addressing either of these ladies that way again. You're a slimy snake, stealing money from kids and the church., and in my opinion, you should fry. If I were you, I'd sit still and listen to what they have to say.

Maddie: Mr. Dougherty, if this were to become public, it would not do any good for either you or St. Philomena's. You would probably end up serving jail time, and it would not help the church to get back its money any sooner. So we have a proposition for you.

Maddie: Nothing, if you meet the terms of repayment. Hopefully, you will take the opportunity to relocate. Regardless, we will expect regular payments, or we will turn the information over to the authorities.

Maddie: Here is your copy. It outlines a payment arrangement, and gives you information on getting in touch with our firm if you relocate, or have any other questions or problems.

David: You are one lucky sucker, Dougherty. Get a grip……and get your act together. And if you don't keep your word, I'll find you. I guarantee it.

The church hall is full of people from the oldest to the youngest parishioner . There are tables full of food, and men carrying pitchers of beer back and forth to the tables. A DJ table sits on the stage, and the dance floor is packed.

David stands on the edge of the floor, watching Maddie dance with a short, bald man. She smiles and laughs at something he says, then waves at David as they glide by.

Mickie: David Addison! A schlub….not likely! Know what I see when I look at you? A genuine, fun loving catch of a guy who is absolutely head over heels about that woman out there. Why would you think any lady wants more than that?

Mickie: And don't let me ever hear you knock South Philadelphia again, Addison, or I'll come up with a special punishment for you.

Mickie: Do bears bear? Do bees be? I've got to go check on a couple of things. Meet me back here in an hour for the twist contest. Meanwhile, go dance with the pretty lady before Mr. Santini bores her to death.

David: One of the best days of your young life, huh? Let me give you a word of advice, kid. If they have one of these shindigs when you're an old guy like me, don't throw the invitation in the trash. Promise?

Maddie: I've loved this whole week……every time I turn the corner, I see you, and what this place has contributed to the person you are. Maybe if my life had been a little different, I might be a little more relaxed, huh?

Maddie and David stumble down the jetway , and emerge into the busy terminal. They are laden with carry-on luggage, and both seem sleepy, and irritable.

David: That only works if you live in Kansas, kiddo. C'mon, give me that big bag, and you take the smaller ones. We're not getting anywhere standing here.

They look out onto the crowded terminal, people rushing, pushing, shoving……everybody in a hurry, and looking extremely unhappy.

And especially Lizzie, who I tortured all day Sunday, because I trust her judgment most of all. Her support means more than I could ever say.